Monday, March 31, 2014

Things You Can Only Do At A Writers Group

Yesterday I read this article about Three Things You Can Only Do At Church. Every bit of it is true. How interesting that the definition of acceptable behavior is so tied in to the activity or location.

Which, of course, made me think about how that applied to writing. And I began thinking about all the things that are only acceptable in a group of writers.

1. Openly discuss various ways of murdering someone/hiding the body. 

This happens disturbingly often, particularly if you have any suspense writers in the group. I have many friends that wonder if an internet-watching government agency has a file on them based on their Google searches.

A variation of this for the less gruesome among us involves contemplating ways to utterly ruin a person's life. Seriously. It's like a torture think tank.

2. "Oh my goodness, I love what you just said. Hold on, let me write that down before I forget it. You don't mind if I use that do you?"

Yes. I have heard and said this on more than one occasion. Writers are flattered and excited. "Normal" people look at you like you have a screw loose.

3. Have a career without ever getting paid.

It won't do much for your bank account, but your self-esteem might enjoy it. If you are a writer, you claim being a writer, whether you've ever gotten paid for it or not. Outside of the ring of authordom, this conversation gets a little awkward.

Person: What do you do?
Me: I'm a writer.
Person: What do you write?
Me: I writer Christian Regencies (although I'm about to totally steal Patty Smith Hall's line and start saying I write Regencies from a Christian Worldview.)
Person: gets excited "Yeah? Do you have any books with you?" (Or some variation of that)
Me: I'm not actually published yet. Soon, though. I'm working on it.
Person: awkward silence

4. Admit to the myriad of voices and personalities swarming through your head.

"Writers aren't people exactly. Or, if they're any good, they're a whole lot of people trying so hard to be one person." ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald

That. Pretty much.

5. Wear a costume. 

I know writers what wear corsets, kilts, and other genre related paraphernalia. It's not quite Comic Con or anything, but it would draw a strange look or two out in public.

Fellow authors, chime in below! What do you have to add to the list?

Friday, March 28, 2014

Recent Giggles in Memorable Media

I love following people on Social Media that make me laugh. I haven't done an internet recap in a long time, so here's some giggle worthy moments from the last few weeks.

@JimGaffigan: Those people not on social media look so silly making no effort to gain the approval of strangers over the internet.

@Traveurysm: Someone should make a movie that starts with upbeat music and about 100 consecutive establishing shots of New York City

@robfee: I wonder if Superman ever put glasses on Lois Lane's dog and she was like, "I've never seen this dog before. Is this a new dog?"

And even though the true joke is the completely random bracket I made based entirely on if I liked the sound of the name or knew someone who went there...

@J_P_Sloan: I tried to fill out a bracket today but the best I could manage was a parenthesis.

An no social media wrap up of the last few weeks would be complete without me including a bit about the amazing and awesome craziness that ensued on my twitter feed during the Rita/Golden Heart finalist announcement.

If you go here, you'll see my name on the list under the Inspirational category for unpublished writers. I'm incredibly excited and have every intention of putting those feelings into words for a post Tuesday. Until then, some thoughts on the day:

@NobleRorick: Watching the #ritagh noms is like watching the Oscar noms except you know everyone and are all "yay!" instead of "huh?"

@Alyssa_Day: Best call: Me: May I speak to @JillShalvis? This is Alyssa Day from RWA. Her: Hi! Wait, is this a RITA call? Me: No, your dues are late.

What's the funniest line you've seen lately?